Service/Mission/Leadership Blog

College teaches you a great deal of things.

You learn responsibility, to a certain extent.  

You learn how to ask good questions, real questions.

 You also learn some good life skills, like how to keep your mouth shut so you won’t sound silly, and how to put your alarm clock on the other side of the room so you actually get out of bed when it sounds each morning.

You learn to survive off of Ramen Noodles and RedBull.

If you’re really disciplined, you may even develop some study system to avoid procrastination/mediocre grades.

You learn to use your resources, and you begin to realize the importance of your surroundings.

But more than anything, college teaches you that you don’t belong.

Or at least, this is one of the biggest lessons it’s taught me so far.

I bet that statement sounds pretty depressing at first. Prospective students are thinking, “What are you saying, crazy Judson blogger…I don’t belong at Judson?”

I can even hear my own mother; “I don’t know why I’m paying room and board for you to go to school somewhere you don’t belong!”

But that’s not exactly what I mean.

I have no doubt that I’m supposed to be here at good ole’ JC; God has given me some pretty clear direction on the matter. But even as much as I love Judson, things don’t seem to fit as well as they used to.

And I’ll bet that if you dare to be very honest with yourself, you’ll realize what a strange and wonderful idea college is.

Think about it:

You leave everything you’ve known for the past 17-19 years of life to work and study, becoming well versed in a particular area, only to receive a piece of paper and move away again.

You go home for Thanksgiving and Christmas, only to discover that your little sister stores her things in your bedroom, and that all of your high school friends suddenly have new noses, new lifestyles, and new last names.

You know that college is a stop on the way, not the destination. Why else would the know-it-all thirty something’s in your family keep asking you where life is taking you, what you’ll do with your fancy degree, and where you see yourself in ten years?  

Speaking of belonging…why are you hanging out with middle- aged people, anyway? Oh…right…it beats watching MTV with all the teenagers and, unfortunately, there’s not another rocking chair left on the front porch with all the old people.

I don’t know if this is a phase that all college kids go through. Probably so…there’s nothing new under the sun, right? But I am starting to wonder if people ever feel like they belong; are grandparents content to sit in their rocking chairs and watch the “younguns” play football in the front yard? Do they long for the days that are behind them? Or are they still as anxious as a confused college student…always longing for the days ahead?

I don’t think St. Augustine ever attended Judson or came home from college for the family’s Thanksgiving dinner, but he seemed to know a little bit about belonging and the feelings we college kids start to get about halfway through our undergraduate journey.

He put it this way:

You awake us to delight in your praise; for you made us for yourself, and our hearts are restless until they rest in you.

I’ve learned a pretty good bit so far at Judson, and I still don’t have answers to questions like, “Where do you see yourself in 10 years?” but that’s okay. I’m just looking forward to a spot on the Front Porch.

Without Wax

The stage was set.

People began to take their seats.

Judson girls swirled around backstage like leaves in a thunderstorm.

I finally got into wardrobe. My construction paper necktie took forever to get on straight.

Someone pulling a curtain rope yelled, “Ready?” and it was time to take the stage.

I wasn’t supposed to go on until the second scene, and as I listened to my Judson classmates bring the audience to tears of laughter, my mind wandered to thoughts of boxes.

Yes, boxes.

One sits on my book shelf in the dorm here at Judson, and it’s blue and green with a swirl of a design that looks like it came straight from a fairy tale book, tied by the quaintest little blue ribbon you have ever seen.

Another is brown and made of tin; this one’s a little banged up, and its pattern is wearing. I have to stick it in the bottom drawer of my desk for no one to see.

There are a few white boxes with labels on the “bookshelf of my youth” at home in Thomasville. They’re piled up next to stuffed animals, children’s books, a yearbook from my senior year, and a very moving anthology of poetry composed by yours truly during the junior year of that awkward time called “high school.”

Birthday cards, wilted flowers, too many crinkled photos, strange odds and ends like tiny glass slippers, pages ripped from vintage books, and Mardi Gras beads fill many of the boxes. There are love letters, hate letters, ticket stubs, and postcards from places you’ve never heard of. Every single box is just brimming over with memories… with tangible evidence of those memories…with souvenirs.

Even with as many “Judson boxes” I have taking up space in my dorm room…my souvenirs could never top the way my classmates and I pilfered through our souvenirs from the past couple of years together. But, for these precious memories, there were no frilly designs or ribbons to untie.

There was nothing to hold in our hands, but plenty to hold in our hearts.

After one student had been nominated and elected as director, the junior class made a list of memories from our time together and put on a short play Saturday afternoon, following Hockey Day. I played Mr. Matthews, a Judson faculty member who is ALWAYS taking pictures at EVERY single Judson even. I’ve even seen the man in mud boots climbing over rocks in the Cahaba River snapping shots with his Nikon…while holding an umbrella.

We remembered long nights of Pageant practice, the time a toilet exploded in Kirtley Dormitory during our freshman year…an event we affectionately refer to now as the “Kirtley Flood.” Then there was the time a group of girls (myself included) built a fort in the dorm lobby, and no one knew what was going on the next morning when they left for class.

We portrayed normal days in class, made fun of the idiosyncrasies of our favorite professors, and relished the time we’ve had together thus far…especially since a lot of girls are third year seniors (thanks to Judson’s 2-10 program), and they’ll be graduating in the spring.

As much as I love my boxes full of odds and ends of the big and little happenings of life; this Judson tradition, called Wishing Well, has really helped me to see…once again…the importance of people, how special Judson is, and the value of a memory.

Painted on a tapestry

We see the way it has to be

Weaving thru' the laughter and the tears

But love will be the tie that binds us

To the time we leave behind us

Memories will be our souvenirs

-Michael W. Smith

Without Wax,

I used to be a compulsive list maker, and it saddens me that I haven’t made anything but “to do” lists in quite sometime.

So…I give you…

The Condensed Version of a Long List with a Long Title about the Best Season of all at the Best College of All:

Or, in other words, these are my favorite things about autumn and Judson.

1.   Hockey Day! This is a fabulous tradition that happens on the first Saturday of November right here at Judson College’s hockey field. The different classes play each other, and then an All-Star team plays any returning alumnae who dare to grace the field (Actually, our returning Judson girls usually stomp the current students)! Practice started last week, and I’ve already seen some girls come into dinner with their shin guards and quite a few gnarly bruises to show off!

And it is SO MUCH FUN to either watch or play. J

2.  Crunchy Leaves! No, I am not kidding. And yes, I will go out of my way to step on these crunchy leaves. I realize that I may be a bit biased, considering that I am a Judson student, but our quaint little campus is so charming when all of the colors begin to change.

3. Treats on Bibb Street! The Department of Faith-Based Service and Learning gets together when all of Judson’s campus organizations (KDE, Campus Ministries, SGA, SIFE, Tri-Beta, Psychology Club, etc.) to give all the kids and families in our community the most spectacular Fall Festival/Trick-or-Treating extravaganza that you could imagine! The event usually happens at the end of October, and I think that Judson students usually have even more fun serving the community than the kids who show up for the event.

4. Scary Movie Nights with S’mores Now, this isn’t technically a Judson College tradition, but I love when the weather gets cool. My friends fire up the grills behind the clubhouse, a hangout spot on campus, to make s’mores and new friends. I have achieved a personal victory already this autumn by actually finishing a scary movie, and yes, it’s okay to laugh at that J

5.   Missions Night! Campus Ministries held the first last night, October 14^th. All of Judson’s summer missionaries are going to take turns telling their stories, sharing how God moved in their lives and the lives of those they served, and inspiring other Judson girls to find how service fits into their own stories. Paula Fendley spoke last night; she spent the summer in the Philippines working in an orphanage for malnourished children. I’m still digesting all of the things Paula told us about, but you can bet you’ll have the opportunity to read a more detailed blog on this one next week sometime!

Last year, Judson College invited Mary Kay Beard to speak for one of our weekly chapel services. Judson girls heard Mrs. Beard’s story and how she had to go all the way to prison to come to an understanding of how her story fits into God’s story for humanity.

But that was only the beginning.

After making it onto the FBI’s Most Wanted List, being landed in prison for bank robbing, and repenting from a sinful life and accepting Christ, Mary Kay began to notice some things about her fellow inmates.

Anytime church groups came in to hold holiday services or just “regular” Bible studies, they would always bring things to give to the inmates. Usually, it would be practical things...soap, toothbrushes, etc. But, as Mrs. Beard noticed, the women would almost never use these toiletries. They would wrap them up and save them; some would even cut deals and make trades with other women.

Why…Mary Kay wondered…would they do this? (The ladies obviously needed soap…the prison didn’t provide these types of items).

Once Christmas time rolled around, our speaker told us, she understood. Families visited during the Christmas holidays.

She watched from behind the scenes as children who hadn’t seen their mothers in weeks, months or even years, excitedly ran up to these thieves, murderers, and prostitutes for a warm and long-awaited embrace.

Before the children left, their mothers would give them their Christmas present…usually a toothbrush, a package of soap, or some toothpaste.

Flip ahead…a few chapters later.

A few years later, after Mary Kay had been released from the Julia Tutwiler Prison and graduated from Auburn University, she began a career as the Director of Prison Fellowship. She was the first female to hold this position, and when her first assignment was given, her mind and heart immediately took her back to the Christmases she spent in jail.

She had been instructed to develop a Christmas program. As Mary Kay recalled those mothers and their sweet babies…she knew that it was time to think outside of the box and do away with the traditional prison programs.

Mrs. Beard set up Christmas trees in two different malls in Alabama. She had lists of children’s names ready, and she began to ask people to buy a Christmas present for the son or daughter of an inmate…they were already at the mall doing their Christmas shopping, right?

After about five hours on the first day, Mrs. Beard was running out of names. Soon she was contacting prisons all over the state to give all the shoppers someone to buy a gift for.

Her idea, now thirty years old, has spread to all 50 U.S. states, along with 114 foreign countries.

Today…we call her idea Angel Tree Ministries.

Mrs. Beard reminded Judson girls of our stories in God; they are all different, but all meaningful. She reminded us of the importance of prayer. Praying had obviously become an irreplaceable part of her life while serving her sentence and while later serving to meet the needs and desires of about 9.3 million children across the world.

It is the one thing, she told us, that has always been a part of her story.

It was about this time during the service that I started to think about the children I’m serving here in Perry County. I often wonder why God won’t make things better, especially in one of the twenty poorest counties in the nation. Many of my prayers become wordless, and there are days when burn out and frustration set in like the plague.

My story in God isn’t quite coming together as Mrs. Beard’s has. And, you know, it may never come together just right. God doesn’t always use us how we think He will, and sometimes we just don’t see what He’s doing. Did Mrs. Beard have any ideas that prison would change her life, along with the lives of many others, during her first weeks in jail? I doubt it.

Figuring out our stories is a frustration for...well…everyone. But is especially a concern for teens and young adults. Next time I’m wondering what’s going to happen next, don’t know when to turn the page, or have strayed from the plot of my story, I hope that I remember Mary Kay Beard’s words and her call to constant prayer.

I hope I remember the advice of a criminal…

“God doesn’t tell us to pray in order to inform Him, He tells us to pray in order to obey Him.”

Without Wax